It’s a difficult time for everyone right now, especially for couples who’ve had to postpone the wedding they’ve been planning for months, maybe even years. As their support system, it is important that you acknowledge the struggle they are going through and help them push through it.

You may not know what to say or you might not think that you can do anything to make this easier for them, but you can try. 

You have to do your best to help them even if you don’t know what the future will bring for them, or you. All you know is that by the time this is over, the couple will have an amazing story to tell.

Here are some ideas that YOU can use to help the couple with the postponed wedding get through this!

Make Sure They Know How Much You Care

The way you send a message matters. They’re likely dealing with their wedding vendors, getting messages from friends, and reading all the news online. We love the idea of taking the time to write them a hand written note of encouragement.

Anyone can quickly send a text saying how sorry they are – but it takes some time to write a note. Plus, getting an actual piece of mail from a friend is really fun and exciting, since we’re all used to just getting bills and flyers. 

Be Careful of Your Own Advice

It’s easy to give the couple some advice on what they should be doing, but no matter how good the intention behind it is, don’t give it unless the couple asks. 

They’re likely overwhelmed by being told how they should go about postponing their wedding, how they should switch it to this date or that, how this venue might not do well in the winter but their other option isn’t as nice – the list is endless.

Do them a favour – hold off on your opinions until they are asked for. The couple knows they have a lot to figure out. They don’t need reminding. They need to be given the time and space to sort through it at their own pace.

Provide Them With a Distraction

The couple has probably had their postponed wedding constantly on their mind. That amount of stress is exhausting, but it’s likely hard for them to find an escape from that. You can help by finding something that will provide a distraction.

This may be a little bit of a struggle to figure out at first because it’s not as if you can invite them over to your place for dinner or go for a walk downtown with them. However, there are some fun alternatives you can suggest and/or try.

Suggest a virtual game night or try out new things like Netflix Watch Party. You could order dinner and have it sent to their house so they can have an at-home date night. You can have a happy hour over FaceTime (or Zoom) and talk about anything but their wedding. 

Check-in on Their Life, Not Their Wedding

Check-in on them, but not about their wedding. 

Between themselves, their friends, and their family, the couple has likely been talking about their wedding constantly. They don’t need any more questions about their wedding. They’ve probably been answering the same ones over and over again, if they want to bring it up in conversation, engage, but maybe they just need to chat and not talk about it.

Show that you care about them and not just their wedding by calling to check in on how their day-to-day life is going and how they are handling staying at home, adopting a new routine, and keeping boredom at bay. Ask them about their pets or what they made for dinner last night. 

Even with all this advice, it’s important to remember that you can’t make everything better. The couple is going to be going through a lot. They’ll likely have rough days where the last thing they want to do is talk. Be patient with them. You’re there to support them in whatever ways you can and some days that might just be to leave them alone.

Remember, we WILL get through this. It’ll all be worth it when you finally get to see your friends walking down the aisle knowing that you helped them when times were tough and that you get to be there to celebrate with them.